explicit (sorry)

yesterday's match was quite close, we scored 2 or 3 tries but lost by 2 tries i think but one of them shouldn't have been; their try-scorer stepped out of the pitch on her way to the try but the touch judge didn't see.

thing is, though what kind of a fucking flyhalf am i if i can't fucking score tries or set them up effectively? i know deep down that if em had been playing instead of me, with her powerful running and sidestepping and defence and kicking abilities we probably wouldn't have lost.

i don't know what to do, i seem to have very brief 'flashes of brilliance' (and that's an exaggeration mind you) on the field, and for the rest of the time i feel mediocre.

i don't know what to do.